Front Row in the Millennial Section
My relationship with music over time and getting out of a rut... at CHAPPELL ROAN.
I don’t miss much about being young.
I love my thirties - the confidence, the wisdom that comes with age, even the silver streaks in my hair. I don’t mind that every day I understand The Children less. I’ve accepted it’s not for me to know how they style their socks, why their makeup looks so flawless or the proper way to use their slang. However, there is one part of getting older I cannot accept. My music taste is frozen in time. Hop into the passenger seat of my Civic to be transported to a tropical beach circa 2006 courtesy of my Caribbean Colada air freshener and a playlist of Elder Emo bangers.
It wasn’t always like this.
My first job was at an independent record store, BK Music. I still remember standing among the CD racks where the owner offered me the job. I was always on the cutting edge, he told me. Can you imagine any better compliment for a teenager? Filling out my first I-9 form in the break room, I took in the piles of promotional CDs and posters littering the dim room. I felt like Aladdin in the Cave of Wonders. Later that day, I’d put on my own personal 100% off sale by running every credit card incorrectly. I’ll always be grateful for the opportunity to have worked there, albeit it briefly and ineptly.
Throughout my teens and early 20’s, I lived for live music (I would’ve called them shows, never concerts). I’d often end up smushed against the barricade, coming home with bruises from knees to hips and wearing them like badges of honor. It was total elation when those first chords hit, deafening you to the outside world as a sea of kindred, sweaty strangers pumped their fists to the music alongside you. I was on cloud 9.
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It’s this nostalgia that draws me back time and time again to the songs of my youth. My brain is wired this way and so is yours. A phenomenon called the Reminiscence Bump means our memories from the ages of 10 to 30 stick with us more strongly than other times in our life (source). According to neuropsychologist Catherine Loveday, the brain’s levels of dopamine and oxytocin increase when we hear the songs we love. Professor Loveday shared with the BBC ‘“There is evidence that structural elements of music get physically tied to our autobiographical memories’” (source). No wonder it’s so easy to get stuck in a loop of the same music you’ve listened to since high school.
Is it possible to recapture those old feelings, or was it lightning in a bottle?
When I was young, it was simple to discover new music. Music savvy friends burned me mix CDs. There were a few iconic dives you could visit any given night and find something interesting to listen to. I’d like to blame my stagnant taste on those old friends drifting away or my favorite venues shuttering. However, the truth is I’ve gotten lazy. For nearly the last decade, Spotify has been my refuge for discovering new music. I’ll lay in bed scrolling from artist page to artist page or listening half heartedly to my Discover playlist on my commute. There’s none of that organic excitement that comes with hearing a new band for the first time with a friend, like when the local opener steals the show.
On top of that, the sheer quantity of music available for streaming is overwhelming. Spotify alone has over 100 million songs (source)! Our attention spans are short these days with so many things vying for our eyes and ears. I’ll confess, if a song doesn’t immediately grab me I’m hitting skip for the next one. Spotify even called me out on this in my 2023 Wrapped:
The result is an echo chamber. Spotify wraps me in a cozy blanket of 2016 indie folk, feeds me auditory junk food à la classic Taking Back Sunday. I can hear you now saying, “Why don’t you just delve into a Spotify playlist curated by someone with their finger on the pulse, explore the new releases, generate a radio station based on a song you like?” To that I say, like a whining child, but it’s not the same! A person’s taste in music is as unique as their fingerprint and Spotify/etc. cannot compete with organic recommendations from people I know. Something is lost in the world of algorithmically refined taste.
Musical DNA
When I reflect back on what made those musical memories so special, the common thread is human connection. My music taste was passed down to me from anyone and everyone. I inherited Motown from the old '60s songs my mom grew up listening to and played back for my sister and I in the car. I danced around the house to Jimmy Buffet courtesy of my dad. I spent a summer in a beat up SUV, amps at my feet, riding around with my first boyfriend’s band and getting a crash course on the entire spectrum of punk rock. As a little girl, I did my great-aunt’s makeup as she watched opera. I fell in love with Vivaldi’s Four Seasons from a cassette I picked up from the thrift store. A special place in my heart is reserved for the Spice Girls, Backstreet Boys and Hanson - the songs my friends and I choreographed routines to in our backyards as kids. I’ll always adore “Home” by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros because it was the first song I danced to at my wedding (it was 2012, need I say more?).
What I’m trying to say is, these songs are special to me because of who and what they connect me to. It’s not so much about the music as it is the experience. In short, I want to discover and experience music with other human beings rather than find it through an algorithm and only consume it passively.
Where to go from here?
I’m not alone in this. Look at the success of Taylor Swift’s Eras tour and movie. Beyonce’s Renaissance tour and movie! People didn’t go just to hear the songs and go home. They dressed up, traded friendship bracelets and partied in the parking lot when they couldn’t get tickets. There was a sense of community and shared joy. To me, this is a testament to so many of us seeking connection in the age of social media.
On Thursday, I was able to experience this myself by attending Chappell Roan’s biggest show so far. Chappell is on the verge of taking over the pop scene - a hugely talented star, LGBTQ+ icon and especially popular with the younger crowd. She has themes for each show and encourages her fans to dress up. Richmond’s theme was Pink Pony Club and 99.9% of the crowd arrived decked out in rose hues, glitter and cowboy hats.
Fans who couldn’t get tickets for the sold out event stood on the bridge to watch, to the delight of Chappell and the crowd. At the skies dimmed, a train rolled by and tooted its horn for the audience. I stood in the back roasting in the sun and danced like nobody was watching, as did those around me. It was incredible to feel that joy radiating around me again.
I’m older, wiser and admittedly cringier than ever. My experience delving back into the world of live music cemented my desire to not let my taste get stagnant. There’s so many amazing new artists out there and I want to find them!
Here’s my plan to get out of my rut and find new music that resonates.
Live Music
Obviously, I have missed live music! In addition to Chappell, I had a chance to go barhopping along Nashville’s Music Row last month. From itty bitty Tootsie’s to the multi-story institution known as Kid Rock’s Big Ass Honky Tonk, I drank in new music. It was a total blast, with bands encouraging us to dance along and strangers recommending spots to see the best bands. From festivals to dive bars, I’m keeping my eye on event calendars for opportunities to expand my horizons.
Create a shared routine
This entire post was inspired by a routine of my husband’s friend. On Friday nights, he and his wife make dinner together and stream a newly released album in its entirety together. I too listen to music while I make dinner. However, my Spotify Huntress tendencies get the best of me and every few songs are interrupted by me yelling “Alexa, next!” Do as I say, not as I do.
Record stores
These days, you’re most likely to find vinyl for sale at your local record store. I’m ready to get digging again. The experience of listening to a vinyl record forces you to slow down and focus on the music. Then of course there is the giant canvas for album art. There are still songs you can only access via old LPs as well. Check out an album that draws you in with cool cover art or maybe one from another country or with an interesting instrument. It’s also a nice way to support local businesses and get some new suggestions.
Independent radio
When I was young I drove old cars with no CD player and listened to a lot more radio than I ever do now. One of my saving graces was a local independent station. When I researched for more ideas to find new music, I was surprised to see lots of suggestions for independent radio. Curious, I looked into my local station and have fallen back in love. It’s taking the work out of finding interesting new music outside of my normal genres.
Give it time
I’m ready to give songs a second chance rather than write them off for good if they don’t hit immediately for me. Sometimes it just takes time to fight that urge to retreat into the familiar.
Think outside the box
Music documentaries and books, checking out who influenced my favorite artists, dancing, learning an instrument - there are so many ways for me to experience music without just passively listening. I’m ready to take them on.
Questions!
How about you?? How are you finding new music these days? What are those songs that always spark memories for you?
Until next time,
Gabriella
You are the freaking coolest! These are always so fun to read and that pink skirt is amazing. 🩷 Love the idea of listening to newly released albums in entirety. I also find myself stuck in past decades when it comes to music and getting overwhelmed with Spotify's abundance.
I loved this so much. I also really relate. It’s hard for me to let go and let something new, that maybe I’m not into right away, get a chance.
I just started getting into Chappell Roan, like the last month or so, and I’m obsessed. So fun. 🪩